Getting Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: A Life Skill for Youth
Getting Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: A Life Skill for Youth
Life isn’t always a walk in the park. We’ve all been there—feeling burnt out, wishing someone else would take over our tasks, whether it’s finishing a project, making lunch, or taking care of responsibilities that we’d rather not deal with. And let’s be honest, we’ve all probably said or heard, “Life isn’t always rainbows and unicorns.” The truth is, life requires effort. You’ve got to show up, do the work, and sometimes—face discomfort head-on.
When it comes to parenting, there’s often a natural instinct to protect our kids, shield them from difficulties, and ensure they stay comfortable. After all, no one wants to see their child suffer or go through challenges. But what if, instead of constantly protecting them from discomfort, we reframed the way we think about support and growth? What if we could help them learn the invaluable skill of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable?
You may wonder why this matters, or if it’s worth pushing them outside of their comfort zone. The simple answer is: resilience. By allowing our kids to experience discomfort, we prepare them for the challenges life will throw at them. Sure, it’s hard to watch them struggle, but in the long run, the resilience they build in these moments can give them the strength to rise to occasions where others might falter.
Life doesn’t always go according to plan. Sometimes things don’t work out, or we have to push through challenges that seem impossible. It’s in these moments that we develop the skills to persevere. And the earlier we start developing these skills, the more equipped our kids will be as they face challenges later in life. Whether it’s academic struggles, personal setbacks, or the inevitable curveballs that life throws at us, knowing how to navigate discomfort is a vital skill.
So, as parents, how do we support our kids in learning this skill?
Encourage Effort Over Perfection: Help your child understand that it's okay to struggle. Celebrate the effort they put into tackling a challenge, even if the outcome isn't perfect. This mindset fosters a healthy approach to failure and encourages resilience.
Allow for Challenges: While it may be tempting to smooth the path for your child, consider letting them face difficulties on their own—whether it's solving a tough math problem, finishing homework without assistance, or figuring out how to manage their time effectively. These challenges help them grow stronger and more confident.
Teach Problem-Solving Skills: Rather than giving them the answer or solving the problem for them, teach your child how to work through problems. Show them how to break a task down into manageable steps, stay calm when things don’t go as planned, and keep moving forward despite setbacks.
Model Resilience: Kids learn by example. When you face challenges in your own life, let them see how you handle discomfort. Share with them how you approach tough situations and show them it’s okay to be uncomfortable as you work through challenges.
Promote Growth Mindset: Encourage your child to see mistakes as opportunities for growth, not as failures. A growth mindset helps kids understand that learning often happens through discomfort, and that it's part of becoming better and stronger.
It’s natural to want to protect our kids, but sometimes, the best way to provide for them is to let them navigate discomfort and uncertainty. It might not feel easy or comfortable in the moment, but allowing them the space to face challenges and develop resilience will set them up for a lifetime of success, no matter what obstacles come their way.
Imagine the kind of resilient person your child will become when they learn to embrace discomfort early. They will know how to handle the tough stuff, bounce forward from setbacks, and rise to meet the challenges that others might avoid. In the end, the ability to get comfortable with being uncomfortable may just be the very thing that allows them to shine when others can't.